Ohh, A Juicy Secret

Ellen writing.
When my husband was in high school he had a less than respectable girlfriend. She has inserted herself into our marriage from time to time over the past 11 years...without provocation. I've always actually sympathized with her. It is not in my nature to be jealous when it comes to my relationship with my husband. She is unable to even stir that emotion due to her level of ridiculousness. Melissa(the ex)exhibits genuine mental illness tendencies.

Mitch and Melissa dated for a considerable amount of time. At the age of sixteen, Melissa was with child. This is not an issue of denial, paternity was legitimately questioned. During the pregnancy, the relationship ended but not Mitch's commitment to care for this baby boy if it were determined he was indeed the father. Sadly, the child suffered from SIDS(Sudden Infant Death Syndrome), the paternity was never determined. Mitch had met baby Marley several times. However, he refused to make an emotional connection to Marley until he was sure this was his son. As I said, it was reasonably doubted. He attended the funeral services and mourned for this child and the possibility of "what if?" This was 19 years ago, before speedy DNA science and gestational paternity testing...no autopsy.

I pitied her. How devastating it must be to lose a child, a pain I can't even fathom. Even when she called my home, asking to speak to Mitch, I was courteous, merciful, even gracious. Maybe because I was thinking "What the...?", or because I knew he'd have no desire to talk to her. Regardless, I never felt threatened.

Occasionally, we'd see "Florida Call" on the ID and didn't answer. The possibility that it could be her, angered Mitch. She has contacted members of Mitch's family "innocently" asking about him, referencing "his" child...stirring the pot. Still, I say nothing.

Today on facebook(which is the devil by the way), to my surprise, she appeared as a suggested friend. I had a little laugh. Then like any wife, had to look at her profile...after all she is the ex. She had just posted pictures of a baby girl she bore. I was actually happy for her. Hoping in some way, that this baby would not replace Marley, but allow her to be the mom I assume she was aching to be.

Then I saw her photo caption.

"Mitch-Wish you could have stepped up back then. Then maybe our baby would still be alive...SCUMBAG!"

Enter the Bitch. I sent her the nastiest compilation of words I have ever composed. As I mentioned in my bio, Mitch is a dad to be modeled. He has struggled, more so after the birth of our sons, with the "what ifs". "What if he was mine?..What if we could have gotten results sooner and I had sole custody?" Not knowing has been painful for him.

Among all my ranting and strong advice for her to stop contacting Mitch's family, I still found myself explaining to this pitiful woman, God is Grace. He gives us what we DON'T DESERVE, NOT WHAT WE DO. He doesn't take the lives of our children as punishment for our shortcomings, not even someone like her.

The Mama Bear was exposed tonight. Do not attack her family or her den. Her fury will be unleashed. She is not as graceful as her God.